#ive been harboring these thoughts for so long lmaoooo

[old-stoneface]

okay. the thing that particularly strikes me, in guards guards, abt the comparison of ankh-morpork to lady sybil to The Dragon is that it is often cited as all being...positive? in a sense? ive seen it argued that sybil being so directly compared to those two items, alongside vimes being a direct parallel to errol in that book (and the entire watch being compared to draco vulgaris (total wittles, at first they were novel and now theyre just a burden, etc)), is a sign that it is all written to be a straightforward love story between sybil and vimes. i disagree. i will say that their relationship is foreshadowed Very Early On, like, from the moment that sybil is introduced, and its pretty clear through their interactions that theyre going to end up together, despite my frustrations lol. i just think that being the "damsel in distress" is an inherently bad thing for women in pratchett's stories, because it leads to dysfunction. anyway. my point here is that not only is it not a clear love story, and it is not written to be one, but the complications of their relationship and further marriage are also teased throughout the book, and it all starts with vimes being a complicated and dysfunctional character. the book opens with vimes rolling a medium success in shivers and giving us a little monologue about how the city welcomes you in, and the city is distinctly a woman, but once youre in her arms she'll kick you in the teeth and send you back into the gutter. there is never any indication of whether vimes has been in a relationship before being with sybil, but it is implied slightly - hoooweveeer i am not referring to when colon says that vimes was "brung low by a woman". i believe colon, having seen vimes very drunk many times, has heard him do his monologue about the city being a woman who treats you unfairly. in fact, we have confirmation of vimes talking about that, shortly after the bar fight scene with carrot in the mended drum. this monologue - where vimes outlines the relationship he has with the city, how he feels very proprietory of it and yet still despises it, is a clear indication of how vimes views heterosexual relationships. Any relationship he has with a woman will be defined by the negative aspects first and probably never the positive, because of Who Vimes Is As A Person and what his view of gender is. we have these scenes where sybil is obviously trying to tell vimes she has feelings for him, and vimes outright rejects her every time but the last, which is when he is feeling overwhelmed by the weight of her affection and he realizes that this may be his only chance to not die alone. vimes turns to this relationship as a last resort. even though sybil is extremely generous and supportive, vimes feels THREATENED by her advances, and not in the same exhilirating way that he gets when he is being attacked. btw there is a lot to be said about how vimes has an addiction to danger and how vetinari often leaves people believing they have just escaped with their lives, but thats another post. i have more thoughts on this, i think i have more ideas to develop here, this is just the beginning of my gay vimes thesis but this post is getting so long........

[the-winter-spider]

Ive been working on something… trying to sort of branch out (ive still been working on my other fics as well dw) BUT this is a AU with an OC 🥺🥺 its a bucky fic OF COURSE but i already have 52k words lmaoooo 😅😅 honestly might way till im done to post parts so i dont leave people hanging we’ll see! Ive never written anything like this or this long WOW

——

Homecoming is a deeply emotional and nostalgic story of love, loss, and second chances. Eloise ‘Ellie’ Rogers returns home for the summer after years of being away at college, carrying the weight of her mother's death and a toxic relationship she can't seem to escape. As she reconnects with her past—her family, her close-knit group of friends, and Bucky Barnes, the boy who once held her heart—Ellie begins to unravel the complexities of who she was and who she’s becoming.

Surrounded by familiar faces—her brother Steve, her fiery best friend Natasha—Ellie seeks solace in the place that raised her, while battling the grief of her mother's passing and the unresolved feelings she still harbors for Bucky. Years ago, Bucky and Ellie’s connection was undeniable, but life and unspoken fears drove them apart. Now, as the summer heat ignites old memories, Ellie must confront the truth behind their separation, and Bucky must face the fact that his feelings for her never truly faded.

But things are more complicated than they appear. Ellie is stuck in a possessive relationship with Tommy, a boyfriend who embodies everything toxic in her life. His jealousy, especially over Bucky, tightens his hold on her even as she longs to break free. And all the while, Bucky is haunted by his own past—his struggles with PTSD from the army and the missed opportunities with the only girl he’s ever loved.

With her heart torn between the past and the present, Ellie must decide if she’s willing to take the leap and fight for her future. Can she reclaim the love she’s always wanted with Bucky, or will the ghosts of their past—and her own unresolved trauma—keep them apart?

Homecoming is a story about finding strength in vulnerability, learning to heal after loss, and discovering that sometimes, love deserves a second chance—especially when it’s the love that never really left.

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Thoughts??????? 💭